For the past few months, I’ve been creating, writing, and music-ing. Yes, the rumors are true. I am releasing a meditation album this year! SURPRISE!
I can’t wait to reveal the final product to all of you. It’s different from any other guided meditations you’ve ever heard. I know that those of you who are new to meditation or are looking for a new guided meditation album are going to absolutely swoon over it. I’m working with my amazingly talented friends and I’m so grateful that they have confidence in my vision. None of this would be possible without them. Three months in, and and we’re already halfway through the project. I can’t get over how smoothly things are going.
And despite all of this, I constantly fight the desire to quit. Every day, my ego creeps in and says, “This album is going to be a total flop. Just quit now.” It’s fear. Fear of failing. Fear of rejection. Fear that people won’t want to purchase the album. Fear that people will not find it useful. Fear, fear, fear. When you have lots of fear and a great desire to quit, you know you’re onto something good. My fear has become so loud that I’ve named my ego so that I can literally separate it from my Highest Self. My ego’s name is…brace yourself…Helga. As in Helga Pataki from Hey Arnold. Yep. I went there. So, we have Heather (Highest Self) and Helga (ego). Lovely, huh?
This little tool has helped me so much. When Helga pops up and tells me I’m a failure or the album will be a flop, I acknowledge the fear. Ignoring the fear will just cause me to resist the fear – and what we resist persists. So, I say hello to fear and ask the Universe to show me the opportunity in this obstacle. And always, the immediate answer I get is, “Go to the piano. Just keep going.” So, I do. And everyday, I’m realizing more and more that this is the lesson. Just finishing the album and not quitting is the lesson.
I think fear is like a muscle. The more we train ourselves to co-exist with our fear, the more it becomes a natural part of any new process. And the more we co-exist with our fear, the more we can use it as a sign that there is something to be learned and something to grow from. Fear is trying to tell us there is a great opportunity in disguise that we must work with – not against. Fear is one of our greatest teachers because, if we choose co-exist with it and ask the Universe to show us the opportunity, we can really show up and prove to ourselves just how strong we are. And that allows us to further grow into our Highest Potential (Highest Self).
So, no matter what, I’ve made a promise to myself to sit my butt down at my piano and play. It can be one hour, three hours, or 20 minutes. It doesn’t matter how long I play. Just that I do it. The desire to quit will always be there. This time, I’m choosing not to listen. And every time I choose not to quit and choose to leap, the net will appear. And the net comes in the form of little miracles. I will get a new idea to enhance a song. I will get a loving text message from someone. Those little bread crumbs are not coincidences. They are signs of synchronicity from the Universe, reminding me that it is my biggest cheerleader when I can’t be that for myself.
What about you? Do you have the desire to quit at something you’re insanely passionate about?
Take this mantra with you today, courtesy of my friend Steve: “I will continue to place myself in situations that challenge my ability, regardless of my fears.”