Guess who completed her Reiki I training? Yep, me!
I learned so much yesterday. Not just about Reiki but also about myself. Wanda Morrison, Reiki master and the incredible mother of Angela (owner of Mind Body Barre) led our Reiki Level I attunement. It was just me and my friend Kendalyn who were receiving our Reiki I, which made it a lot more intimate and special.
Reiki gets a bad rep in the mainstream world. And while it can seem a little “woo woo,” it’s totally legit and transformative. I grew up learning that Reiki was “Devil’s work.” I grew up afraid of energy and spirituality because I was taught it would be a sin to engage in something that was not “God’s work.” Now, I know this all stems from people holding onto an irrational fear and having a strong desire to control people according to what they believe is right…instead of letting go and letting people form their own path to connect with Divine energy.
Reiki (prounounced ray-key) is a Japanese word that means “soul energy.” It is a Japanese healing methodology that was rediscovered in the 19th century by a scholar named Mikao Usui. The history of Reiki is so interesting! You can read more about there here if you want.
The attunement process was amazing. During a Reiki attunement, the Reiki master (Wanda) passes on Reiki energy to the Reiki practitioner (me). It basically rasies your energetic vibration. In other words, you are being given Universal life energy (from the Divine / God / Goddess / Life / Source / Spirit) that will raise your energetic frequency. So, you can hold more space for positive energy and cultivate a deeper intution and connection between your mind and body. It helps to bring negative emotions to the surface so they can heal, if you choose to heal them, so that you can be a true being of light on this planet.
Still with me? Don’t run away. Ha!
The attunement was rad. And super emotional. I felt emotionally hungover when I left but it was for good reason – stuff was coming to the surface as an opportunity for me to heal it.
I learned something about myself: I still need to work on LETTING GO. For as far back as I can remember, my ego has been telling me that, if I’m not perfect, I’m doing it wrong. Whatever “it” is, if I’m not doing it 100% perfect, then I’m wrong, I’m a failure, and I should just quit. I know this is part of the reason why I developed an eating disorder. When things weren’t perfect (aka always), I would feel out of control and project that control onto food.
Thankfully, I’ve done a really good job at coming to terms with the fact that I can’t control everything. I don’t want to control everything. It’s exhausting and too much work. I like to follow my heart and take action while trusting the process of being led to the next right action. When I stop and check in with myself and release my desire to control to the Universe, it’s easy. Life flows. Synchronicity and miracles occur. When I let my ego convince me that I need to control everything, life doesn’t flow. Synchronicity is absent. I feel exhausted and depressed. So, it’s obvious which of the two options is better for me. Right? Right.
After the attunement process, Wanda said, “You need to let go and stop trying to be perfect. Just stop it. It’s not serving you.”
I guess I thought that since I’ve been in sober recovery from my eating disorder for three years, that my perfectionist tendencies had lessened and were, therefore, less impactful. But that’s not true at all. Anyone who suffered from addiction has to be conscious of how they’re exhibiting addictive behaviors and that includes me. I’ve been out of tune with this.. I don’t have the desire to control things all the time. I’ve come a long way and really do love setting my heart on something while the going with the flow of how the Universe takes me there. It’s heart-centered action and it’s so beautiful. But I still have some work to do. I need to chill the eff out sometimes, and, like Wanda said, “Just let go.”
A Course in Miracles says, “To teach is to learn.” I’m always a student and always will be a student and, yesterday, I was schooled on perfectionism. She totally called me on my shit. So, I’m ready to let go and have even more fun.
Bring it on!